When I tear, its not patched, its not stiched....Its broken...Looking for a way to fly, back into the sky, soaring high again, where I belong.

Tuesday, August 10, 2010

Miracle

Last semester was probably the most eventful semester in my academic life, out of the plenty thing things that could have happened to me, I ended up living with a thief. Scratch that. Day Light Robber.

My dumb school decided that two in a small room was just not punishment enough, so they added one more person. Let me introduce you to Miracle.

Yes, that's her name. Fresh from the holidays, the diploma students had resumed before us so Miracle was allocated to my room. I walked in to meet a slim, tall girl lying on the top bunk, her hair woven with rubber thread and wearing funny looking clothes. She was so nice and quiet, she helped me carry my stuff to the room.On further inquiry, I learnt she comes from a rather large/modest family and her father is a deeper life pastor. From such a name as "Miracle", I certainly was not wrong to expect a golden child with exemplary behaviour.

Soon enough, money started getting missing in my room from as little as N500 to 1000. I'd leave my wallet or bag on my table/wardrobe and take a little nap, money would disappear. At first I suspected my other roommate because it had just been discovered that she was on some ashee levels, so I'm like maybe she's stealing my money for her paroles because her money never got missing. Then one day, she complained that her N500 got missing. This was rather strange because there was a power outage in my room and it was pitch black; meaning that the thief must have been on some sort of James Bond mission or she was lying. I opted for the latter and she remained a prime suspect. lol. Soon we (I and other roomie) stopped talking but the stealing continued. It was not only money oh, indomie and drinks also included. One time, my friend kept her drink my fridge, 6 hours later it was stolen. It was embarrassing explaining that I have an invisible thief in my room - before dem think sey na me steal drink

The money that was stolen were small amounts but multiply it by 6 or 7 times and altogether I lost over N5,000. Most of these times, what was stolen was my last kobo, my only surviving means. I cried, cursed, pleaded; the thief remained. Miracle would still wear her all white and march to church every Sunday morning. Did i mention that Miracle was very hard-working? She was. She was quite scattered, but she was very dutiful in cleaning up the room. When I was still in good terms with my other roomie, she suggested that Miracle was the one stealing since we had no such problem when it was just both of us. I was like, Miracle, Never! Pastor Pikin?

The last straw that broke my back was during exams. I was flat broke for weeks, I got money from home and I was so excited. I shared this little information with Miracle and she joined me to celebrate. When I'm cooking with my friends I add miracle's mouth o, they give her their old clothes, I'm friendly to her..etc. Summary, I'm nice to her.

So, that fateful day, I had just N1,000 left in my wallet, I was alone with Miracle in the room. I took out the wallet, checked the money and returned it to my wardrobe. I left the room for a few minutes to my neighbour's room. I returned, Miracle was gone. I opened my wardrobe, checked my wallet, the money was gone. This was when it finally dawned on me that she had been Stealing and Smiling for months! My other roommate was not around that morning, so it definitely was not her.

I was mad! I went for my exam, came back and called her to the room. I confronted her, I even lied that I saw her coming out of the room. Miracle still denied. I went to report to the hall administrators, silly people didn't take me serious because the money was small. I should wait for her to steal me abi? mscheew

That was a few days to vacation, so I stopped talking to Miracle. Meanwhile she had started bubbling, she stopped weaving thread and started doing wool instead (soon lace wig go join), started rubbing lipgloss like it's going out of style, she'd spend hours (mid night call) giggling on the phone with some dude (choirmaster?) and she slim-fitted her clothes.

I'm sure she knows that she cant be my roommate this coming semester, my other roommate has graduated so it's just going to be me and 2 new people. Hopefully, I have better ones this time.

27 comments:

jhazmyn said...

Lmbo...seems like miracle was trying by her own means to work a miracle in her life o...thank God she's outta ur room, and lets hope the new set wont share her vice.

Thank God i never shared rooms with a thief, God knows my patience wears thin when dealing with pple who steal from me

BBB said...

men just make sure u keep all things locked...
na wa for thief oh

cerberus said...

Seems you need a miracle guapa.

The nitty-gritty tales of a housewife said...

lol...shiooo....if na pastor pikin nko?....start locking up your cupboards & food locker & put the key in your pocket always...she would definitely be caught one day...this is why parents should not restrict their kids too much..just like a bird when set loose from it's cage, it spreads it wings & fly high....

Miss Natural said...

woah lol. i cant believe this, she really was bold oh. Some people sha. Plus you have interesting, very interesting roomies lol

T.Notes said...

Ehmmm,is it wrong for me to laugh?!!Chic's a regular "Charlie's Angel"!!!

kay9 said...

***smiles...***
At least u gonna have new roommates now, let's hope the 'disappearances' disappear then.

LE DYNAMIQUE PROFESSEUR said...

How can someone be named miracle and still be stealing miraculously? lol

- LDP

TheFish said...

Funny Though, am sure you will get someway to get her off!

Myne Whitman said...

"Stealing miraculously" na wa o.

YankeeNaija said...

I know it sucked that she stole from you, but the way you tell is so funny. Sorry hun, couldn't help but laugh. But upside, she's out of your hair. Good luck on the next set of roomies.

ELEYETH BLAZE said...

*cracks knuckles* thats all

Jaycee said...

Kai!

Azazel said...

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Azazel said...

Lmao DEAD @ stealing and smiling

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musco said...

first, whick skl be d skl?

You shld just have organised maximum 'shishi' for the girl.

All the best with the next set of roommates!

bArOquE said...

stealing sha...
you mean you did not do anything to her?
are you gonna let her get away with it?
btw, what kind of school do you go to that the school forces roommates on you? abi na boarding house?

ZeL said...

@jhazmyn : Thank God o. I'm really hoping on that. Its a terrible thing, girls stealing.

@BBB: Thats the way forward my sista.

@cerebrus : lol

@ Nitty Gritty Tales of a Housewife : She cant leave with me anymore, most definitely.

@Miss Natural : So bold, i think she did it just for the fun of it sef. Lol

@T. Notes : Lol

@Kay 9: I hope so too

@LDP: Nice one. Lol

@The Fish: I'm done with d girl. I'm even looking for some of my clothes sef

ZeL said...

@Myne Whitman : Lol

@Yankee Naija : Thanks hun

@Azazel : Thanks a bunch!

@Jack Kung : I'm good thanks. Would be at your's in a bit

ZeL said...

@Musco: Its a private christian school o. Nobody wants that kain wahala. Thanks jare

@Baroque: Lol. What would I have done? Beat her? I cant fight, she'll just beat daylight outta me.

They impose roommates on us because they are trying to avoid lesbianism . lol

ZeL said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
ZeL said...

@Eleyeth Blaze: LMAO

@Jaycee: My thoughts exactly.

Thank y'all for stopping by!

LG said...

loll@ashee levels, as for miracle, go tell her 'papa :)
*njoy ur weekend dear

blogoratti said...

Reads like a movie script...miracle,hehe.

Lara said...

you attend babcock university right

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